Starting 11: Les Miles Can't Lose

Les Miles is the most confident man in America. It doesn't matter what situation he faces, Miles believes he will triumph. What's more, he believes that everyone around him will win as well. Little Bighorn? Miles slays the Native Americans and rises to prominence on the Bull Moose ticket. Gettysburg? Miles takes Cemetery Ridge during Miles's Charge and the country remains divided forever (Or it would be one nation with Waffle Houses everywhere). Put Les Miles in charge of any losing proposition in the annals of history and he single-handedly swings the result the other way.

Meet the new college calculus: Les Miles + impossible eventuality = probable eventuality.

I'm going to write on this later this week, but until then, just keep our new equation in mind as we dive into the ClayNation Starting 11.

1. Seriously, is there a luckier man in America than LSU's Les Miles?

Even though we led off the opening with him, he needs to be our first prong of the ClayNation Starting 11.

Last week I said I keep waiting for him to call neither heads nor tails at the pregame coin toss and see the coin land on its side. This week I'm even more convinced this could happen.

Why?

His team scored on a 33-yard touchdown run with under 50 seconds to play. What's more, it was his second consecutive rushing play. It was second-and-five when they scored.

And it's not even like Charles Scott had been gouging Georgia all afternoon. At that point, Scott had 18 carries for 62 yards, an average of 3.4 yards per play. If the average carry happens on that play, the clock is running, and you're facing a third-and-two, with a field goal still in the neighborhood of 47 yards. What's the third down play then? I can't even fathom the thought process. But of course we didn't get there. LSU scored on a running play from 33 yards away.

Seriously, think about this, have you ever seen a trailing team score with under a minute to play on a running play from this distance?

I thought about this all day Sunday. I'm not sure it's ever happened before. Yet, when I saw it happen for LSU, I wasn't even surprised.

Meet Les Miles.

2. Michigan State beats Michigan for the second year in a row.

Congrats to State, but I'm confused, how will Sports Illustrated use this as evidence that sports are making unemployed Michiganders feel better?

Didn't one Michigan team just beat another one? Where's the happy storyline? I've got no job, my house is underwater and I can't sell it, but at least my team won.

Seriously, this is beyond overplayed.

3. The celebration penalty needs to be reexamined.

Last year we had Jake Locker, this year we had A.J. Green, the best player in college football who is getting no attention from the national media.




Look at the above video sent in by a reader. What does A.J. Green do that deserves the penalty? Yes, he drew attention to himself. By catching a would-be winning touchdown pass with a little over a minute to play. Which is kind of expected, right? After all, when you're playing in front of 90,000 people doesn't playing the game itself qualify as drawing attention to yourself?

Which brings to this, asking old referees to classify "drawing attention to yourself" is one of the dumbest phrases in the rulebook. It's not like A.J. Green hoisted Uga onto his shoulders and made out with a cheerleader while giving the throat slash gesture and simultaneously waving the Georgia flag.

There's too much discretion given to the referees with this rule. Especially when the refs exercise their discretion in this manner.

By the way, without A.J. Green, Georgia is 0-5.

4. Curb Your Enthusiasm is too much of a Sunday treat after college football and the NFL.

The last two episodes have been among the best back-to-back shows in series history. And that's truly saying something. I'm going to confess to being a bit disappointed that this show happens in the fall, though. And Sunday on top of it.

I just wish we could unspool television's limited resources more equitably. Like, say, in the month of June. There is nothing to watch on television for the entire month then.

And don't even get me started on Justin Bobby's new beard. That thing singlehandedly laid Kristin Cavallari.

5. How does Virginia Tech pass Boise State after beating Duke by eight?

Can I throw an early flag for team that the pollsters are rewarding more than any other? Boise State is undefeated. Virginia Tech gives up 359 yards passing to Duke and passes Boise. Right now Virginia Tech is overrated.

Why does this matter? Because it suggests that several pollsters have decided that Boise has hit the non-power conference glass ceiling. Last week they were No. 4, now they've been passed by their first team with a single loss. The precedent has been set in the poll that one-loss teams beneath Boise can jump over them. Does anyone really believe that if Florida loses to LSU, they'll fall beneath Boise? I don't think so. In fact, I think Florida would only fall to No. 4.

Virginia Tech's high ranking is also raising some intriguing poll issues, what if Alabama loses to Ole Miss this weekend in Oxford? Can you really justify Virginia Tech being ranked above Bama given the fact that the two teams just played five weeks ago?

I don't think so.

Thank the BCS for this mess.

6. Arkansas and Bobby Petrino pasted undefeated Texas A&M. Is Mike Sherman back on the hot seat?

I think so. Three early wins had taken him off for the time-being. But this new loss has him right back there. Especially with the upcoming schedule that A&M plays. Does 7-5 keep Sherman safe? Probably. 6-6? Who knows.

With Tommy Tuberville out there lurking, there may not be a safe win total. Yep, Tuberville has become Petrino. I'm halfway expecting for there to be midnight plane rides to meet him.

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Latest College Football Photos

In this Saturday Oct. 3, 2009 photo, Florida State head coach Bobby Bowden is shown walking the sideline during the second half against Boston College of an NCAA college football game at Alumni Stadium in Boston. Boston College won 28-21. The chairman of the Florida State University trustees wants Bobby Bowden to retire at the end of this season. Jim Smith said Monday, oct. 5, 2009, the arrangement with Bowden as head coach and his successor, Jimbo Fisher, as offensive coordinator isn't working. (AP Photo/Greg M. Cooper)

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In this photo taken Sept. 12, 2009, Illinois' QB Eddie McGee (10) heads down field against Illinois State during the second half of the NCAA college football game at the University of Illinois in Champaign, Ill. Illinois will start backup quarterback Eddie McGee on Saturday against Michigan State instead of Juice Williams. (AP Photo/Seth Perlman)

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In this photo taken Oct. 3, 2009, Illinois' quarterback Juice Williams (7) scrambles out of the pocket against Penn State during the first half of the NCAA college football game in Champaign, Ill. Illinois will start backup quarterback Eddie McGee on Saturday against Michigan State instead of Juice Williams. (AP Photo/Seth Perlman)

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In this Saturday Oct. 3, 2009 photo, Florida State head coach Bobby Bowden is shown walking the sideline during the second half against Boston College of an NCAA college football game at Alumni Stadium in Boston. Boston College won 28-21. The chairman of the Florida State University trustees wants Bobby Bowden to retire at the end of this season. Jim Smith said Monday, oct. 5, 2009, the arrangement with Bowden as head coach and his successor, Jimbo Fisher, as offensive coordinator isn't working. (AP Photo/Greg M. Cooper)

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In this photo made Oct. 3, 2009, Florida State offensive coordinator Jimbo Fisher makes a call during the first half of an NCAA college football game against Boston College at Alumni Stadium in Boston. Boston College won 28-21. The chairman of the Florida State University trustees wants Bobby Bowden to retire at the end of this season. Jim Smith said Monday, Oct. 5, 2009, the arrangement with Bowden as head coach and his successor, Jimbo Fisher, as offensive coordinator isn't working. (AP Photo/Greg M. Cooper)

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Washington State running back Logwone Mitz, top, attempts to leap in for a touchdown but is stopped short by the Oregon defensive during the second half of their NCAA college football game in Eugene, Ore., Saturday, Oct. 3, 2009. Oregon beat Washington 52-6.

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In this Oct. 3, 2009 photograph, Mississippi State linebacker K.J. Wright (34) attempts to block a first half pass by Georgia Tech quarterback Josh Nesbitt (9) during their NCAA college football game in Starkville, Miss. Josh Nesbitt is making it tough on defensive coordinators. The Georgia Tech quarterback did a little bit of everything the last two weeks, baffling defenses in wins over Mississippi State and North Carolina. (AP Photo/Rogelio V. Solis)

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Stanford running back Toby Gerhart (7) scores a touchdown past UCLA cornerback Alterraun Verner (1) in the first quarter of their NCAA football game in Stanford, Calif., Saturday, Oct. 3, 2009. (AP Photo/Paul Sakuma)

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Houston quarterback Case Keenum and UTEP defender Aaron King chase a fumble during the fourth quarter of their NCAA college football game Saturday Oct. 3, 2009 in El Paso, Texas. Keenum was unable to recover the ball and it was instead picked up by UTEP's Roddray Walker and run 70 yards for a touchdown. (AP Photo/Victor Calzada)

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Houston's Brandon Brinkley agonized after UTEP's Donald Buckram scored his fourth touchdown of the evening during the fourth quarter of their NCAA college football game Saturday Oct. 3, 2009 in El Paso, Texas. UTEP linemen celebrated with Buckram in the background. (AP Photo/Victor Calzada)

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UTEP defender Roddray Walker sprints 70 yards for touchdown after recovering a Houston fumble during the fourth quarter of their NCAA college football game Saturday Oct. 3, 2009 in El Paso, Texas. (AP Photo/Victor Calzada)

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7. Houston loses to UTEP? Even though Case Keenum throws 76 pass attempts for 536 yards and five touchdowns.

76 passes? That's more than Georgia Tech will attempt in half a season. That's unbelievable.

What's even more unbelievable? They still lost despite those stats.

More amazing than that? He only got sacked once. How does that happen? A guy drops back to pass 76 times and the UTEP defense only gets to him one time? And they still win? How frustrating must this have been for the defensive line.

8. At 2AM Saturday morning, I found myself riding in the bed of a pickup truck on Knoxville's strip.

My friend Tardio was also back there with me. We were heading to a new bar. As we sit idling in traffic, a bum walks up next to us. We're both freezing. Evidently, it's now cold outside.

"Y'all got a quarter?" he asks, scratching his beard, as he surveys us sitting in the truck.

"No," we say.

"You better keep your heads down, it's illegal to ride back there."

We scrunch lower into the pick-up truck, arms wrapped across our chests, shivering. Tardio turns to me. "We're lawyers taking legal advice from a bum," he says.

"Who you like between Auburn and Tennessee," I ask?

"Auburn," says the bum.

9. Miami takes down Oklahoma 21-20.

I always enjoy watching the student section at Miami football games because it confirms my thesis on the school. Namely, Miami's student body has the least in common with their football team than any other athletic team in the country. Miami is a small, rich, private school in affluent Coral Gables that enrolls rich white kids from all over the East Coast.

Then their football team has a large number of poor, black inner-city kids. That's fine, and it's good to provide opportunity to deserving kids, but how much of a culture shock must this be for the kids on the football team to be surrounded by this student body?

I want to do a list of these schools, where the dichotomy is greatest, between athlete and student body. Georgetown basketball is No. 2.

10. In the wake of the latest Seminole debacle against Boston College, is Florida State going to become the first school to kick their coach-in-waiting to the curb?

Especially if someone like Mark Richt is interested in leaving Georgia?

I think they might. Then maybe coordinators will start thinking twice about this set-up. While a guy like Jimbo Fisher gets a decent payday, he also loses years of head coaching that would have made him more money. Once one school pulls this move, then the door is open for others to consider it.

I don't think most fans have given it much thought, but once it happens it will turn into a huge story. Uneasy lies the head-in-waiting that wears the contractually obligated crown.

11. Why do I feel like the video of Lane Kiffin attempting to go for two when Tennessee scored on the final play of the game against Auburn is going to haunt me in years in to come?

To bring it full circle, the Tennessee fan inside me is hoping that Kiffin's going for two move will end up just like Les Miles' much ridiculed attempt to call a timeout after intercepting a pass in the Hurricane Katrina moved Tennessee game back in 2005.

Miles ended up winning a national title two years later. Why? Because he told the national title championship trophy he was going to win it.

Even after losing twice to teams with records that were .500 or worse in the SEC.