Joe Paterno's Statue Is More Realistic, Less Hallowed Than You Think

Posted Jan 06, 2009 8:51AM By Brian Cook (RSS feed)

What's your instant reaction to this bit of hijinks?

COACH Joe Paterno's glasses are classics in their own right, and now somebody has taken the glasses from the Paterno statue at Beaver Stadium.

University police reported the disappearance between Jan. 2 and 3 and are investigating it as a theft and criminal mischief.

Is it "holy crap, you can take the glasses off Joe Paterno's statue?" I think it should be, because I think of statues as large pieces of metal that you can't disassemble without a blowtorch, not fancy mannequins.

Joe Paternos Career

Joe Paterno's statue, which was erected outside Beaver Stadium in 2001 when he set the all-time wins mark for college coaches, lost a bit of its identity recently when someone stole the glasses. Click through to recap Paterno's storied career.

Pat Little, AP

Paterno, seen here in 1965, began his coaching career as an assistant coach at Penn State in 1950. He initially thought his coaching career would be short and he would enter law school.

Paterno became Penn State's head coach in 1966. He took the reigns from the retiring Rip Engle, who coached Paterno at Brown.

Penn State went 5-5 in Paterno's first year, but the school became a national powerhouse with perfect seasons in 1968 and 1969 and 11 straight bowl trips from 1973-1983.

The Nittany Lions won their first national championship following the 1982 season, beating Georgia in the Sugar Bowl. They repeated the feat in the 1986 season with an Orange Bowl win over Miami.

Paterno celebrated his 324th victory in 2001. The Lions topped Ohio State at home, 29-27, to make Paterno the winningest coach in NCAA history.

Jamie Squire, Getty Images

Paterno relinquished the lead for career wins to another veteran, Florida State's Bobby Bowden, for a stretch, but holds the record once again. Paterno also owns the record for career bowl game victories.

Jamie Squire, Getty Images

Paterno was a living legend by the start of this decade and his old-school image became stronger than ever. A string a mediocre seasons from 2000 through 2004 prompted questions though about the veteran's ability to coach in the modern age. He responded with an 11-1 record and a Big Ten title in 2005.

Jacqueline Larma, AP

Paterno suffered a severe knee injury while on the sidelines during a game at Wisconsin in 2006. He was forced to coach from a skybox for a stretch afterward.

Morry Gash, AP

Paterno, who turned 82 in December, signed a three-year extension that same month and will be on the Penn State sideline through at least 2011.

Carolyn Kaster, AP

Can you remove JoePa's shoes? His jacket? His shirt? Can you sensuously trail your finger down his chest as you reach for his belt, feeling his rock-hard bronzed abs slip past? Should I stop this train of thought about four sentences ago?

Yes, yes I should. All I know is that if I see a headline along the lines of "Paterno statue's pants, honor taken" I am going to be very, very disappointed in State College, Pennsylvania.

Reader Comments (Page 1 of 3)

2-28-2009 @ 4:30AM

eury said...

Brian,

This is my all-time favorite of your AOL posts.

1-06-2009 @ 1:07PM

GMHWife said...

Lloyd! Take off your coat!!

1-06-2009 @ 6:46PM

Ray Holloman said...

This is what happens when you contract Mr. Potato Head to build your fine campus statuary.

1-07-2009 @ 11:07PM

chris said...

i think i would hide at least half my face if i wrote like a 5th rate sports hack too . your piece re usc & bcs not long ago was a total joke completely unworthy of the time spent reading it.

1-07-2009 @ 12:46AM

Gene said...

I stopped at a gas station out side of State College on the way home from a PSU football game a few years back. Their was no place to put the credit card in just a two buttons that read cash or charge. When I inquired inside the station the person behind the counter said just press how you're paying and begin pumping then come in and tell me how much you put and and pay. I said what if pumped $40 and came in and said I only pumped $10 or just took off and didn't pay at all. To which she replied " then you would have needed the money more than we would". State college is still one of those inocent places left on Earth. Their is a reason they call it Happy Valley.

1-07-2009 @ 4:00AM

mike said...

im sure its a great place to bad they cant compete in football anymore the sames true for the rest of the big 10 they get ran over by sec teams and usc every year maybe they should create a bowl were 2 northern teams play each other so at least one would win a bowl game

1-07-2009 @ 8:04AM

Paul said...

I think I remember Michigan beating Florida last year in a bowl game.

1-07-2009 @ 11:15AM

Duff said...

PSU usually wins their bowl game{Winningest bowl record- Paterno) This year we played USC referred to in CA as the University of Spoiled Children, they played better than we did on that day. However, when I congratulated some USC fans they acted like I had six heads, demonstrating how much they have learned about sportsmanship. Wasn't Tenessee who we beat in the Outback Bowl from the SEC. What happened to SEC Alabama when they came up against Utah

1-07-2009 @ 11:26AM

Mike said...

Except .... Iowa blew away South Carolina on New Years Day!
SEC domination, I don't think so!

1-07-2009 @ 12:39PM

G Hainrihar said...

Yes, spoken like a true SEC fan..."the Big Ten gets ran over".....if they had a "Grammar Bowl" I know where the SEC would finish...

1-08-2009 @ 9:34PM

Dave said...

ahh 11-2 isn't a bad season in anyones conference

1-07-2009 @ 8:37PM

Don said...

We can see where you're from - spelling - D- Bowl games don't make a team - Big Ten still the "BEST"

1-07-2009 @ 4:03AM

i must add to my last comment at least the big 10 looked a little better against a big 12 team it was a little closer ohio st fans want it so bad but its just not happening

1-07-2009 @ 8:19AM

Truth Man said...

Does the Big 10 still play football? It sure didn't look like it this recently completed bowl season.

1-07-2009 @ 8:37AM

Jack said...

I thought maby Joe Pa got contacts

1-07-2009 @ 8:44AM

Bobby said...

Penn State got paired up with the best team in the country this bowl season. I'm from SEC territory & love our style of play but the PAC 10 had a really impressive lineup of bowl participants. USC would dominate in the SEC just like they do in the PAC 10 if they played those guys day in & out.

Penn St. gave em all they could,, the better team just won....

1-07-2009 @ 9:00AM

allan said...

I laugh very loud...
Look at these games...PSU for sure got beat, but they scored lots, gained lots and USC starters played the ENTIRE game!
BTW, look at PSU in the last 10 years...guess some can play!
Ahhh yes, and some can graduate as well!!

1-07-2009 @ 9:08AM

Mark said...

The SEC.is the best conferance in football. They beat up on each other all season long.The best against the best.But I do think there should be a playoff because Utah looked unbeatable against Alabama. Thanks, Mark