Week Four Proposition Bets for the College Football Junkie

Prop Bets for the College Football Junkie is a weekly post that cares not for your silly point spreads. If you have the money and the gumption, we'll lay down a weekly gauntlet of propositions that'll take you from the penthouse to the outhouse faster than you can guess the number of times Lee Corso will say "not so fast my friend." As always, this is for entertainment purposes only.

-Back in the good old days of eastern football, before the Big East, Joe Paterno used to wear us out with ramblings about a winless Temple team that was much better than their record indicated. Naturally, Penn State would win by 50+. But as we care not for point spreads or actual outcomes, we'll look at something more intriguing. Like the over/under on the number of times the off field incidents at Penn State will be brought up by the announcing crew. Given that this game could get out of hand quickly, we'll put that number at +/-10. Just as a way to make your money back, I'll give you a straight up prop on if Joe will make an impromptu run to the bathroom while the game is going on.

-Literally a half hour after I wrote this post I was out and helped a person move their broken down diesel truck out of an intersection. I only had to push it about 20 feet, but was completely out of breath by the time it was safely out of the intersection. Given West Virginia's total lack of respect for the effects of the change in altitude, I'm putting the over/under on the number of Mountaineers that pass out during the game at 15.

-The Alabama vs. Arkansas game this weekend should be billed as the battle of the money grubbing job hoppers. Appropriately, the number or references to the number of countries that have a gross domestic product that is less than the combined annual salary of Nick Saban and Bobby Petrino is set at +/- 5. As a side bet, the number of times ESPN flashes a list of all the jobs the two coaches have had over the past five years is set at +/- 2.

Quick Hitters:

-Number of times Orson refers to Phil Fulmer as "Fat Phil" between now and Saturday +/-5.

-Calls for Dave Wannstedt's head on a platter after Pitt loses to Iowa +/- 100,000. Assuming that there are 100k Pitt fans still alive.

-Likewise, when Eastern Michigan defeats Maryland we put the call for Ralph Friedgen's head at +/- 50,000. Even though we know there aren't actually 50k Maryland fans in existence. Still, don't underestimate the power of the bandwagon haters.

-Chances Greg Robinson gets fired this weekend +/- 80%. This bet is irregardless of whether Syracuse actually beats Northeastern or not. The Syracuse blogging community is just too damn strong to have to put up with this crap another week.